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Fernando must ben saved!

EDIT: Must be saved. I’m in too much of a hurry to spellcheck.
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The Pork Liberation front has posted a picture of the kidnapped Fernando. But they have made a tactical error– the newspaper he is shown in front of is the Oregonian.
Fernando is in Portland!
I am on the next plane there. I will bring him home safely and clear my name. I will not [...]

It appears the claims of the Pork Liberation Front were credible. They have posted a picture of their leader and Fernando.
More to come.
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It is no secret that the Idea of Progress and McGone at the International House of Blogcakes are not the best of friends. This is no fault of your gentle host, fair reader– it is McGone that is the despicable one.
I’ve even made threats against his friend, Fernando von Bakonstein.
Now, McGone is of course [...]